I mean this with great empathy, it is not your stance on divorce but your issues with co-dependency. You are co-dependent on this person and this needs to be treated like your addiction. 10 years was too long for your experiences. It’s not about feeling lost – its about finding your value, worth, purpose, identity without needing it fulfilled by another person. My advice is to seek counselling as there are special groups for co-dependents. There should be no option to return to this person. You can still live your life with out them. Unless you are waiting for them to rescue you or give you what you yourself are afraid to deliver for yourself. It doesn’t need to be this way. There is self esteem and confidence that can be built up in your life and that is the journey for you today. I really wish you great success in this.