Try looking at yourself and how u are contributing. For example, your spouse might be controlling because she feels unsafe, she does not know u will be there for her or u are focusing outside your marriage instead of putting her first. Wife’s way of acting is probably in response to how u act, same as you change how u behave based on how she acts. Try getting help to work out your issues. If you leave wife, u will still be stuck with all your issues, they will all come up again. A courageous person tries to face them. Try to find good help with this wife. Do not discount how you are contributing, and how much influence u can have to change things by changing yourself and being there for wife.