My wife and I came to a roadblock in our marriage -- we weren’t happy, we weren’t communicating and we weren’t united. I was miserable -- torn between staying and torn between leaving. Instead of working on my marriage, I had an affair and felt like a superstar.
This affair carried on for a year – I wasn’t in love with this other woman -- I liked how it made me feel, and I didn’t know how to stop it. My relationship with my wife was getting worse as she felt my distance even more. After a fight one night and a lot of hurtful words, I left with my inflated ego and walked out the door. My wife ultimately divorced me .
The ironic truth is that I never really thought about the consequences or the long-term effects of my behavior. Divorce wasn’t really what I wanted at all ---I miss my wife and family and wish that we would have gone for therapy when the disconnect first began.
I have learned a lot about myself, marriage and divorce in the last few years.
I wanted to share the 5 things I learned about Divorce that people don’t usually tell you!
- Divorce sometimes seems easier than fixing your marriage, -- your marriage deserves an opportunity to try and work things out
- Divorce will not make you happier. You need to work on yourself and recreate to make yourself happier.
- Even if you're the one who thinks they want to get the divorce, you'll still have a lot of sadness and regret
- Leaving your marriage for an affair usually ends up disastrous once the infatuation and allure of the other person wears off
- You find out who your friends are – they usually choose one partner to stay friends with.
Peter, 51
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