Closure

Why does closure seem so important when you are ending your marriage?

As we let go of our marriage we are in desperate need of the appropriate amount of closure.

We seek reasons, rationale, and are in search of the perfect explanation for leaving the relationship… hoping for a clean and simple exit.

But closure almost always never happens in the way we want.  

And even if we acquire that clarification it will never be enough.  There will always be more questions, more angst about how we could have, should have done things differently…

More heartache on how it could have played out…

For those of us struggling for the best answer and evidence to help us heal, it’s best to cut those losses and assume there is going to be none.

You can’t sum up a complex relationship into a line or two … 

And if you can’t handle the lack of explanation then make up a reason – create a tale that makes you feel ok – because you likely won’t get what you need from your ex.

The only way you are going to find your closure is when you accept that your relationship is over and you feel a sense of resolution. ... It's an important part of getting over an ex and the breakup so you can feel confident starting a new relationship down the road.

Jacob, 43, Texas